I have an alarm system in my place. Late last night the standby battery went dead which causes the system to make six ear piercing beeps every minute for about ten minutes every hour. As I sat on my couch nearly napping, suddenly there came a beeping. I went over to the wall panel and pressed the test button.
Quothe the panel: “System Battery Low.”
Me: “Tis the battery and nothing more.”
I went back to my couch to google where the battery for my alarm is and how to remove it. My dogs informed me that it was my responsibility to make the terrible beeping stop. Unfortunately they cannot tell the difference between me trying to find a solution online and my usual night of wasting my life on facebook so my 90lbs german shepherd and my 9lbs pom-chi started crawling in my lap and trying to take my lap top off of my lap.
As I sat on my couch nearly napping, suddenly there came a beeping!
Me: “Tis the battery and nothing more.”
I found where the battery is located and the web site says if I remove it the beeping will stop. Now it has been a few hours each filled with ten minutes of beeping and 100lbs of dog feeling that my problem solving abilities are lacking. I open the case that holds the battery and is it a normal battery? Oh of course not! It’s the 6volt version of a car battery with wires coming out of it. It’s around 0200 at this point, I haven’t been to sleep and the standard pain in my stomach started back up around 0030. I pry out the battery and go back to my couch to start a google search for where to buy this kind of battery. I’m feeling victorious.
As I sat on my couch nearly napping, suddenly there came a beeping!
Me: “Tis the battery and nothing more. FUCK!”
I walk back to the panel and consider ripping it out of the wall or burning my place to the ground. I decide to push the rage down into the ulcer or where ever the pain is coming from. I decide to try to detach the speaker but I’m not sure if this will cause the system to call the police or if I’ll break it. I go back to the couch and google where to find a weirdo battery.
As I sat on my couch nearly napping, suddenly there came a beeping!
Me: “Tis the battery and nothing more. I’m gonna kill myself!”
In my search I find that you can’t buy the weirdo battery anywhere you have to order it online.
It’s now three something in the morning and it occurs to me that I can flip the circuit breaker. My dogs and I are both disgusted at the amount of time it took me to figure that out and the beeping may have actually driven me insane…
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